In this journey I call my life, i wonder where along the way i stumbled and lost a little something. More exactly where and when. That little something which i could not properly word or name until today's sermon by Pastor Michael Koh...desire.
For a while now, i've felt jaded a little more than once. Nothing seems to excite me that much anymore, except for one or two things that come along once in a while. Indifference, boredom, hollowness, directionless...a few of the words that might fit the description of what i sometimes experience these days. And in more than one occasion, i have felt my own self being contradictory...yearning for company and yet isolating or distancing myself when the opportunity comes. I just confuse myself.
Desire. Where and when did i start to lose that, even for the little things i used to like so much. When did it all suddenly lose its meaning or did it happen so subtly and gradually that i couldn't notice. Only when i heard today's message that i realized what it is i had lost. Desire. A desire for life...for life's little things, for the things that make us who we are; the hobbies, the interests, the wishes that defines a person...when did that disappear?
Perhaps i've settled in so comfortably that i cannot move anymore. Perhaps it was disappointments as Pastor Michael mentioned. Whatever it may be, i need to feel desire again, no matter how little. I need to find something to get enthused in again, to force myself to commit to it until i feel it in me again. Then maybe somewhere along the way, i will finally encounter God...and finally feel that i am truly alive again.
Glad to see you back again. I suppose you haven't found any interesting specimen yet. Not to worry it will just happen one of these days. Anyway I hope somebody's little advice below might amuse you:
ReplyDeleteSome interesting Advice for you to have a great start for the week !
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1. Life isn't fair, but it's still good.
2. When in doubt, just take the next small step.
3. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone.
4. Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your friends and parents will. Stay in touch.
5. Pay off your credit cards every month.
6. You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.
7. Cry with someone. It's more healing than crying alone.
8. It's OK to get angry with God. He can take it.
9. Save for retirement starting with your first paycheck.
10. When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile.
11. Make peace with your past so it won't screw up the present.
12. It's OK to let your children see you cry.
13. Don't compare your life to others. You have no idea what their journey is all about.
14. If a relationship has to be a secret, you shouldn't be in it.
15. Everything can change in the blink of an eye. But don't worry; God never blinks.
16. Take a deep breath. It calms the mind.
17. Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful or joyful.
18. Whatever doesn't kill you really does make you stronger.
19. It's never too late to have a happy childhood. But the second one is up to you and no one else.
20. When it comes to going after what you love in life, don't take no for an answer.
21. Burn the candles, use the nice sheets, wear the fancy lingerie. Don't save it for a special occasion. Today is special.
22. Over prepare, then go with the flow.
23. Be eccentric now. Don't wait for old age to wear purple.
24. The most important sex organ is the brain.
25. No one is in charge of your happiness but you.
26. Frame every so-called disaster with these words 'In five years, will this matter?'
27. Always choose life.
28. Forgive everyone everything.
29. What other people think of you is none of your business.
30. Time heals almost everything. Give time time.
31. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.
32. Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does.
33. Believe in miracles.
34. God loves you because of who God is, not because of anything you did or didn't do.
35. Don't audit life. Show up and make the most of it now.
36. Growing old beats the alternative -- dying young.
37. Your children get only one childhood.
38. All that truly matters in the end is that you loved.
39. Get outside every day. Miracles are waiting everywhere.
40. If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else's, we'd grab ours back.
41. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.
42. The best is yet to come.
43. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.
44. Yield.
45. Life isn't tied with a bow, but it's still a gift."
Cheers,
USJ2
woah, pretty long list :p
ReplyDeletethanks for the support, really appreciate it :)